Saturday, August 16, 2008

Entry from Aug 13, 2006

What a week....all I wanna do is crawl under my bed and stay there right now. I had one of my terrible melt-downs last night over something that wouldnt normally bother me. However, since we're on crunch time it really did a number on me. I feel so terrible that I allowed it to bother me the way I did and the fact that it drove me to screaming tears like a child. I havent done that since we moved into this house and I had been hoping I had moved on to being able to cope with difficult situations. I guess not. It may have been I was too tired to work on it, it may have been I was still pissed off at the shop for not following up on an order placed 2 damn weeks ago, it may also be that Im tired of looking at this damn dress too...who knows.

On Thursday or Friday I got my results back and the damn thyroid is "NORMAL". Yeah right. Then what caused the abnormal reading three months ago in the first place?? Im guessing this means that most of my medical problems are my damn fault now and it's time to deal with them.... so what else causes some of these problems other than weight and the thyroid? *sighz* My only thought right now is that maybe this was a faulty reading this time around because 01) we did the test in the afternoon and maybe things run differently on me during different times of day OR 02) the fact I was taking my Provera pills (if you dont know what these are and are curious use Google)... at that point infact I had taken the last dose just that morning. As such, Im wondering if the hormone in it didnt happen to provide the NORMAL reading and if I hadnt been taking it if it wouldnt have resulted in an ABNORMAL reading again. There isnt much I can do about it now though as we're leaving this week for Tennessee on Saturday. I will be calling tomorrow afternoon though to run the idea by the doctor and see what she says (the hormones may been another reason for the melt down last night...not sure but possible). I dont know if she'll want me in or not to be honest as she and I decided on putting me on that Junel again and I've already taken my first dose. She may have me skip the Junel next month and let it go out of my system so we can do another blood analysis. Eww another date with the vampires again ...Im so tired of being a pin cushion.

Called the shop yesterday and found out the product is *STILL* not in. I was real close to giving them a piece of my mind but I simply couldnt...it was my last piece and I kinda still need it. Without it I may as well be placed in a nice room with custom padded wallpaper and an "ILOVEME" jacket with basketweavers all around. I re-iterated that it was necessary that it comes in EARLY this week because I was leaving by Thursday or Friday. It was bad enough it should have been in last week so I could finish my dress anad I been putting the damn thing off until it came in but I hadnt touched the DFH because I wanted the proper undergarment and could they POSSIBLY light a fire under someone's ass? I was assured they'd check on it on Monday. Im going to tell them if it aint in on Wednesday they can just very well keep it then. It'll give me an excuse to go shopping with a friend of mine early next week. Guarantee that if I decide to write a review up in my Yahoo Reviews they wont get too many stars for sure. Good on instore service but SUCK on special orders...I am not recommending them to anyone at this point...even though they have the larger ladies sizes. What good are selling those sizes if you dont keep them in stock? Someone PLEASE answer me that? Two weeks they had AND they knew it was for a wedding AND knew we're leaving this week AND knew I needed it soon to finish the dress....and I was assured it'd be in in a weeks time. Two weeks later and I am SO DAMN GLAD we didnt put a penny down on it.

The DFH really irked me last night. The task was simple. Put the dress on and pin to adjust to fit. How simple could that be? Ok...Babe cant pin for shit (sorry hun...I love you though!) and I simply cant do it myself. We found that out last night. Boy did we ever find that out last night. We also found out where my breaking point is in regards to the DFH and I've quite obviously reached and went well beyond it. Oh yeah great idea...work on the dress when ya pissed off at the shop that cant order your underthings correctly and get em in on time AND ya hormones are outta friggin whack AND you're overtired (sleep? WTF is sleep??) AND yourmindisin15otherplace BUT whereitshouldbe. Thank GOD I started everything early....yeah right. I'm going to attempt to look at it again tonight and maybe actually do something with it without swearing at it. I should just leave it alone and just go shopping but 01) Im a leo and a stubborn one at that...02) The one side looks fine it's just the right side (the side I gotta pin left handed) that's fubar'd. I havent even looked at hemming it yet. *sigh* I dont even wanna think that far. Maybe I'll just say fuggitoll tonite and get into my winecoolers and crawl into bed early. Sound like a plan?

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